Posted by Pascal on September 12, 2022 at 14:26
So, you’ve got a great girl in your life? Congratulations! Being in love can be one of the best feelings in the world.
If you are like most guys, you probably want to do all you can to make this girl feel loved and special. To show her how much she means to you, each and every day. Which quickly brings an important question: how do you do that?
Looking at literature, you have Gatsby, buying a whole house to be closer to his love interest Daisy. Men fighting rivals and starting wars to be with the woman they love. Or following a girl just so they can help her secretly.
In real life, none of this is practical. In fact, these would be huge red flags in dating.
Likewise, movies and TV shows do not offer much better role-models: stalking, being clingy, leaving someone at the altar, showing up at the airport when the girl is about to leave, never giving up even when she is not interested… This does not work, you know it.
In theory, the great romantic gesture sounds wonderful, but it is greatly impractical.
You will not always have the time to take your girl on a vacation last minute or the budget to buy her dream apartment in Paris. Besides, these ideas sound good on paper, but they are not what keep a relationship going day to day.
Instead, try to focus on these 10 simple ideas to make your girlfriend feel special. Use them a little or a lot, and you will be able to show her how much you care.
This is no secret, but compliments feel good when you receive them.
With time, you might have started to compliment your girlfriend a bit less than before. Or perhaps you usually only compliment her on her looks, or when things are going really well.
How about mixing it up a bit?
Show her that you notice her achievements! Of course, without overdoing it, or you will sound fake.
Nowadays, it is easier than ever to get distracted. After all, you probably carry a smartphone in your pocket.
Maybe you even have noticed couples sitting next to each other on a park bench, or on a date at the restaurant, completely focused on their screens. Ignoring each other.
And even if you resist the urge to check the news and the latest sports results, it is still hard. Those devices can really eat up your attention. With push notifications and vibrations letting you know you received a text or an update on a story you are following, for instance.
If you want to make a girl feel special, the first step will be to turn off your phone or put it on silent mode.
But don’t stop there. Try to listen, and really engage in the conversation. To pay attention to what she is saying. To show that you care about what she is saying, about her life and her opinions.
That means re-focusing your mind every time it starts to wander.
Sure, you still have work, family, finances, and a whole lot of things to worry about, but you can deal with all that later. Right now, your job is to focus on your girlfriend. To be present, in the moment, and to listen. Truly listen.
And guess what? If you practice this enough, then talking with your girlfriend will become much more enjoyable. For both of you.
Relationships are not boring by default. They become that way with time, when you get stuck into a rut because of habits and a lack of effort.
To be fair, though, it is completely normal to settle into a routine after a while. It would not be very practical – or even desired – to keep going on fancy dates and crazy adventures all the time. But that does not mean this should stop completely.
So, try to surprise your girlfriend with a fun date or some activity that you know she will like.
And don’t wait until your girlfriend voices her concerns. Plan ahead. Women generally like it when you show initiative like that.
Not only will your thoughtfulness and creativity make her feel special, it will also give you a chance to reconnect, and to create beautiful memories together. And that is a scientific fact: your brain tends to forget routine and habits, but to remember special events.
So give your girl something to remember!
Need some inspiration? Did you know that on a free dating site like Vidamora, you can see people’s favorite activities directly on their profile?
Also don’t forget to check out our best dating advice and latest articles on dating.
If there is one thing your girlfriend might appreciate even more than compliments, it is when you boast about her to your loved ones.
In a way, this is pretty much a compliment that you give about her to someone else.
Doing this does a few things for your partner:
All this is especially useful when you start introducing your girlfriend to your family and friends. Plus, it shows that your opinion is not influenced by what others think.
Of course, cool guys will keep complimenting their girlfriend in public months and years into their relationship.
As a sort of corollary to the previous point, is that you should never put down or make fun of your girlfriend in front of other people. That should be a given.
But you can go one step further by supporting her and being on her side during disagreements. She will feel better knowing you are there to back her up.
Of course, that does not mean you should blindly support her if she is in the wrong or if you disagree with her. Just that you should show her enough respect to not bring it up in public. And if you can, try to help extricate her from uncomfortable or embarrassing situations gracefully.
There is no way that two human beings have the exact same needs, wants, and desires, at the same time, all the time. Even in fusional and codependent relationships, that does not happen.
So yes, it might be frustrating to hear that your girlfriend needs some space. But should you take it personally? After all, you can certainly understand why she might want to have a glass of wine with her best friend or to unwind in front of a TV show alone after a rough day at work. Of course, that means that whatever you had planned will have to wait.
As long as your girlfriend is being respectful and not stepping over your boundaries, let her do her thing.
She wants to do some things with you, and other things alone. Or with her friends. That will not change, but if she has to negotiate, beg, or feel uncomfortable for even asking you to give her some breathing room, your relationship will suffer.
You would most likely expect the same from her, right?
Now, here is how you can make her feel really special: instead of simply “agreeing” to her requests for time alone, try to anticipate them! It could be as simple as booking her a spa day or saying: “You had a long day. Want me to run you a bath?”
The idea is to let her recharge on her own, and have her come back refreshed. That way, the moments that you do get to spend together are much more enjoyable for the both of you.
Don’t fret, you won’t have to show up at her work with a bouquet of roses (actually, you should probably not do that at all).
Nor will you have to break the bank.
The thing is that gifts are pretty much expected on certain dates:
But what your girlfriend will most likely not be expecting is a gift on another date. Just because you thought about her. A gift because you want to make her feel special.
As always, it is the thought that counts. You probably want to avoid big and extravagant romantic gestures anyways, especially in the early stages of your relationship.
Feel free to be creative too. You already know what she likes and what might bring her the most joy. So go for it!
Sometimes in a relationship, you try to hide who you really are. To show only your most attractive qualities and do your best to impress your crush.
However, there is a reason you cannot keep it up for very long: it is exhausting.
So, for the most part, you will show your true colors at some point in the relationship. Well, most of your true colors. You might still be able to conceal some quirks, trauma, or personality faults that you feel too awkward to show even your girlfriend.
With few exceptions, everyone does that. Even your girlfriend.
And do you want to know how to make her feel extra special?
By embracing her personality 100%. Whatever she shows you or feels comfortable enough to share with you, accept it. As long as it still matches with your values, what’s the harm?
Don’t make fun of your girlfriend when she is being weird. Take advantage of the opportunity to show her your weird side!
The more you accept her eccentricities, the more at ease and happy your girlfriend will be with you.
It is that simple.
It’s the little things: when you notice a new haircut, when you get her favorite nail polish from the store because you know what it is, when you remember the name of her childhood best friend or ask about the latest project she has been working on.
Here is why this will make your girlfriend happy:
The things you can actually remember are limited. So when you choose to remember things about your girlfriend’s life, you are also opting to not pay attention to other things.
Intuitively, your girlfriend knows that. And she will definitely appreciate it.
Hugs, kisses, holding hands, brushing the shoulder, sitting next to each other… touching is important in relationships, and there is something for any personality and level of comfort.
You can’t always say everything you want to say directly, but you can communicate a lot through physical contact. Depending on how long you have been with your girlfriend, this is one aspect of your relationship that might need some work.
This is important because:
So there you have it, 10 ways to make your girlfriend feel special and loved.
Being in a relationship, especially nowadays, is already a rich and fulfilling experience. You owe it to your girlfriend, and to yourself, to make sure it is filled with as much love, care, and attention as possible.
Your girlfriend is already special for you, now make sure you show it to her!